"Stereo Dynamics! To Scare Hell
Out Of Your Neighbors"
Various Artists, 195?
stereo first came out, the big thing was to test-drive your system for
your pals, showing them all the sounds that could come out of your speakers.
Companies cashed in on this offering many a record who's hook was just
that. Stereo Dynamics! To Scare Hell Out Of Your Neighbors
is just such a record, with seven tracks that could scare you neighbors
only if they realized how bad the music is. As with classic albums, the
artwork save the record from being an exercise in annoyance--what else
says neighborhood terror and stereo better than two hanging skeletons (one
for the left side/one for the right?) The text on the back is also worth
noting: "While this program is varied in musical content, all the selections
have one basic characteristic; a dynamic, full-frequency range with a vital
contrast of orchestral colors. From original studio performances to the
final lacquer mastering and electro-formed parts for pressing, this program
covers the maximum range of stereo reproductions." Final lacquer mastering?
Electro-formed parts for pressing? What do these terms mean? Not much,
except you too can sound like a sound engineering expert while you and
your friends are standing over this spinning record. The seven pieces on
this record include "Adolf Hitler" except from Edmond De Luca's Conquerors
of the Ages
(ok, this one is scary, but in a B-grade horror film
sort of way); "Fire Goddess" by the Surfmen (exotica); Toccato in D Minor
by Bach (everyone knows this one); La Paloma by the "Stereo Scored Magnificence
of 101 Strings" (the Strings strike again!); "Richard Diamond" by Skip
Martin's Video (?) All Stars (grindhouse); "Scheherajazz" from Skip Martin's
Symphony in Jazz (he gets around); and "Flamenco Candido" by Buleria Curro
Amoya Dancers (Latin dancers on a record?). So, when Stereo Dynamics!
they're out there to "Scare Hello Out of Your Neighbors" they ain't kidding!